A leading infidelity expert looks at the link between financial infidelity and sexual infidelity, and lists 9 signs of financial deception.
(PRWEB) November 9, 2005 -- According to two recent surveys, financial infidelity, or dishonesty about spending habits, is a problem in approximately one-third of all marriages and other committed relationships.
A survey jointly sponsored by Redbook magazine and Lawyers.com found that 33 percent of women and 26 percent of men in committed relationships said they have been dishonest with their partners about their spending habits. The 2005 Women & Investing Survey from OppenheimerFunds yielded similar results. However, an infidelity expert calls attention to the fact that neither survey mentions the link between financial infidelity and sexual infidelity.
Ruth Houston, an infidelity expert who has spent the past 11 years researching the topic of infidelity, says, “ It’s interesting to note both surveys omit any reference to the connection between financial infidelity and sexual infidelity, because the two are often linked. My research indicates that financial infidelity often accompanies sexual infidelity.”
When Financial Infidelity is a Sign of Sexual Infidelity
According to Houston, the New York-based author of Is he Cheating on You? – 829 Telltale Signs, “If both parties in the marriage or relationship have freely shared financial information in the past, and one party (usually it’s the man) suddenly becomes secretive about money matters or begins withholding information about spending habits, it’s usually a sign of sexual infidelity. “
“If a man is involved in an extramarital affair, sooner or later it will be reflected in the family finances,” Houston explains. “A cheating husband will often resort to financial infidelity in order to conceal the fact that he’s spending money on his mistress. Affairs cost money. If he’s wining and dining the Other Woman, and buying her gifts, he’s going to be less than honest about these changes in his spending habits.”
Houston acknowledges that here are also times when a wife may resort to financial infidelity. “If a wife suspects her husband of cheating on her, or has discovered that he’s having an affair, she may start putting money aside in order to financially protect herself and the children in the event of a divorce. This will often take the form of siphoning off small sums of money from the household budget or joint bank accounts.”
Telltale Signs of Financial Infidelity
“A spouse who knows what to look for can usually find evidence of financial infidelity.“ says Houston, who is also the founder of www.InfidelityAdvice.com Listed below are 9 telltale signs of financial deception taken from Houston’s book, Is he Cheating on You? – 829 Telltale Signs (Lifestyle Publications, $29.95). Chapter 12, entitled Financial Affairs, lists 52 financially-related telltale signs.
- Credit card statements that reflect charges for flowers, jewelry, lingerie, or other gift items that the wife did not personally receive.
- Unauthorized or surprise withdrawals from joint bank accounts.
- Deposit slips or bank statements which indicate the existence of a previously unknown checking or savings account in the wife’s or husband’s name only.
- The liquidation of assets (stocks and bonds, stamp or coin collections, artwork, etc. without a plausible explanation.
- Misrepresentation of, or failure to mention raises, bonuses or overtime pay.
- Income tax returns which reveal unexplained or previously unknown travel related deductions.
- A sudden decrease in disposable income.
- A sudden increase in ATM withdrawals.
- Financial records ( cancelled checks, receipts, money orders or other documents) which indicate that he’s maintaining a separate residence or has been paying someone else’s bills.
Financial Deception Can Indicate Other Problems
“Financial infidelity doesn’t always indicate sexual infidelity,” cautions Houston, “but it’s usually an indication of a problem of some type. It could be anything from a communication problem between the couple, a credit problem, or financial difficulties, to a problem like gambling or substance (drug or alcohol) abuse on the part of the person lying or being secretive about financial affairs. Financial infidelity is usually just the tip of the iceberg. Financial deception can indicate other types of deception, as well. A person who is dishonest with their marriage mate or significant other about spending habits, may be dishonest about other important things too. In almost every case, the situation warrants closer investigation.”
About Ruth Houston:
Infidelity expert Ruth is the author of Is He Cheating on You – 829 Telltale Signs which documents practically every known sign of infidelity. Based on over 10 years of in-depth research, this book is the most comprehensive infidelity reference of its kind. For a FREE tip sheet describing the 21 major categories of infidelity signs, send an e-mail to InfidelityAdvice@gmail.com ( InfidelityAdvice at gmail.com) with “categories” in the subject line. For more information about infidelity, visit http://www.InfidelityAdvice.com
Ruth has been quoted in the New York Times, the New York Post, Newsday, the Toronto Sun, the Houston Chronicle, Cosmopolitan, the Christian Science Monitor, MSN Lifestyle, iVillage and numerous other print and online media. She has been a guest on The Today Show, Good Day New York, BBC, CBC, TalkAmerica, 1010 WINS and over 150 radio and TV talk shows in the United States, Europe, Canada, South America, New Zealand, and the Caribbean.
To schedule an interview with Ruth Houston, call 718 592-6039 or (InfidelityExpert at gmail.com)
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